BullShit — You May Never See It The Same Way Again

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My childhood summers were with my maternal grandmother in the deep villages of South India. Early before first light, she ventured in front of her simple yet spacious home, swept the street in front of the house and picked up the bucket to wet the ground by sprinkling water.

After that, I still remember how her gold bangles glistened in the first light as she gave the finishing touches to the flower design that adorned her welcoming entrance — fresh every morning.

One day, I noticed that her sprinkled water was laced with a secret ingredient. I asked her what it was. When she said cowdung, I gave her a combination of quizzical and disapproving look. All she did was smile.

She asked me to monitor the entrance for insects and scorpions. I spent many summers there. None entered her home. My 4th grade educated grand mom knew a thing or two about organic cow dung. Years have rolled. I am now a seemingly well-educated grandson. Still short on grasping her wisdom.

No bullshit — the mystical merits of cow dung parade way over my head.

The 3 laugh out loud on real bullshit.

1. Real Bullshit and Great Careers

A turkey was chatting with a bull “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.”

“Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.”

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.

Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there.

How many times have we really connected bull’s dung to bullshit? An eye opener.

2. When Cow Dung Rained Diamonds — A BBC story snippet, Asia edition.

In 2004, Mohobat Sang Gohil lost 2,000 diamonds on his way home. He was a jewelry trader.

He retraced his steps and did some detective work. One stray cattle was digging into a food packet with the same type of paper used to cover the diamonds. The packet was well left by the rest of cattle.

He rounded up that cattle and took him to a compound where his hunch was confirmed.

His dung vigil paid sparkling dividends. Only about 20 to 25 a day though. In discussion with the cattle owner, laxatives were ruled out, as thin dung was not a good carrier of diamonds. A strict diet of dry fodder and persistent daily vigil for more than a month, did the trick.

The daily icing — Government officials visited often to ensure no cruelty to the animal.

3. Why is it cow dung and bullshit, but not cow shit and bull dung?

Quora has the best answer:

“Cow dung was good for fertilization, but not bull dung, it was coarser because of the testosterone levels, so it was considered shit . A farmer would try to hide the bull shit with cow dung, when trying to sell it as fertilizer. The purchaser would say your not bull shitting me are you. Hence we have the word bullshitter, I just told you a bunch of bull shit.”

Mixing it all together — the punchline.

The truth about bullshit — 90% of humanity indulges in a version of it, rest 10% lie.

Seriously, who wants a serious discourse. Every. Living. Moment.

Hope you enjoyed the light-hearted bullshit around bullshit.

Did any of the stories bring out the smile inside you? Which one?

Karthik Rajan

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Stories to fuel your mind. Theme: life’s hidden treasures in plain sight. Goal: Warm tone, solid content, crisp stories. About me: one google search away.

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