When the world runs one way, I run other way and sometimes, find gold — here are some.
1) Use ‘I’ when ‘You’ is the norm
When I am angry/distressed, “you are a ripping nuisance” could be one truth.
“I feel distressed” could be the other truth.
The choice to expose which truth was always mine. I chose the latter with great dividends.
Watch the you and I…
“You didn’t explain this point.” became “I didn’t understand this point.”
“You are wrong” became “I have a different perspective.”
“You make me mad” became “I feel unappreciated”
We are all taught not to point a finger at others. Very few of us are coached to use the “I” when it matters.
As a parent, this became a life skill of immense proportion — the bigger you grow, less power you have.
2) When content is king, I like to focus on comfort and context.
At get go, a deep dive into the subject at hand — works for a Ph. D. dissertation. What got you there, sometimes keeps you there.
What propels select few are genuine words of acknowledgement prefacing counterpoints (I hear you, I see where you are coming from).
Or words of curiosity that showcase a self-belief to learn (why do you say that? help me understand better etc.)
How, what, when, which, where- these questions are implicitly answered by many in their conversations.
I like to first answer the why. The answer to the why gives context. And context has a calming effect on how content is received.
Side bar: here is my context on why I am a contrarian.
How I Found My Voice
Deep down, I knew I had something to say. Instead, I sat there frozen.
3) When many in the world run to catch the early train to work, I like to lay awake in bed for another 10 minutes.
Lying in bed, cozy in thoughts, I like to imagine how success looks like for that day.
Apparently, I am not the only one. The Olympic champion Michael Phelps, in his words, “before I doze off or immediately after I get up, I can visualize how I want the perfect race to go. I can see the start, the strokes, the walls, the turns, the finish, the strategy, all of it. It’s so vivid that I can see incredible detail, down even to the wake behind me.”
In my life, the mental eye’s power of visualization and planning has worked wonders — superseding all others.
Sometimes, the best life hacks happen when you laze around.
4) When the world looks for mentors, I let them look for me.
I chuckled when I read the following words from Facebook COO, Sheryl Sandberg. I was involuntarily nodding my head.
“We need to stop telling them, ‘Get a mentor and you will excel,’ Instead we need to tell them, ‘Excel and you will get a mentor.’”
There are ounces of truth based on my experience — success indeed breeds mentors.
5) I believe the mind is susceptible and weak
I believe the mind is malleable. Easily swayed. Being on guard is stressful.
Pushy salesman are obvious. Marketers are polished.
Distance from enemies is easy to orchestrate. Frenemies?
I take the easy way out — surround myself with positive energy and a preponderance for positive words. That involves choice but I need luck too
I like my mom’s prayer — keep everyone around me happy. I mimic her.
Dopamine and Words — The Intimate Connection to Happiness
What is your measure for happiness?
Bonus 6) When bloggers abhor traditional listicles, I embrace them now.
Only twist — I densely say what I need to say quickly and let it linger in your mind.
Isn’t the benefit of a listicles to quickly scan?
Happy scanning and thinking,
Words from Well Wishers
Anirban Mukhopadhyay Technical Lead at Tata Consultancy Services || Ex-Capgemini || Ex-Wipro
An engrossing article! You have a way with words and then let the words have others. Great one!
Cheryl Snapp Conner, CEO of SnappConner PR, Creator of Content University™, Forbes and Inc Contributor, Author and Speaker
“Karthik — you need more than a blog. You need to write a book! I love every one of these points. You are a brilliant human being, truly.”